The Paths We Choose

I chose to be a mother. I love being a mother. But lately I have been very overwhelmed by this choice.

Motherhood has been the best, most amazing experience and I am only 6 months in, but I  find that at times I am too hard on myself about doing it all. It is hard to let go of things that I used to be able to handle. Things like a making dinner every night, having a clean house, an empty sink, laundry hampers that aren't overflowing, and an even halfway organized office seem to be harder and harder to achieve. 

To finish a day when the kitchen is a disaster, the fridge is completely empty and the office is piled high with papers it does not always seem like enough that my baby is alive and happy and loved. But I am slowly learning to let that be enough. In the moments when I let that be enough, I am much happier and overall a more patient and a better mother. 

When I stop to think about it and talk through it, it becomes much less overwhelming. I can focus on my baby and there are people that I can ask for help with everything else. First off, we have been able to hire help for me in the office (the best decision ever), we have a cleaning crew who we hired to help with the house, and most importantly I have wonderful friends and family who will bring me dinner and pick up my prescriptions when I can't get out of the house and make me feel normal when I want to cry and make me laugh when I feel like I'm about to pull my hair out.

Now since I haven't posted in forever I will just dump all the recent photos of my baby on you. I literally kiss him and tell him I love him a million times a day.  

My sweet Phoenix is 6 months old he is almost 18 lbs. He can sit up, has two teeth and he talks all day long, I mean alllll day long. He LOVES to eat. He'll chow down on sweet potatoes, avocado, pears, pretty much everything he tried!