The Paths We Choose

I chose to be a mother. I love being a mother. But lately I have been very overwhelmed by this choice.

Motherhood has been the best, most amazing experience and I am only 6 months in, but I  find that at times I am too hard on myself about doing it all. It is hard to let go of things that I used to be able to handle. Things like a making dinner every night, having a clean house, an empty sink, laundry hampers that aren't overflowing, and an even halfway organized office seem to be harder and harder to achieve. 

To finish a day when the kitchen is a disaster, the fridge is completely empty and the office is piled high with papers it does not always seem like enough that my baby is alive and happy and loved. But I am slowly learning to let that be enough. In the moments when I let that be enough, I am much happier and overall a more patient and a better mother. 

When I stop to think about it and talk through it, it becomes much less overwhelming. I can focus on my baby and there are people that I can ask for help with everything else. First off, we have been able to hire help for me in the office (the best decision ever), we have a cleaning crew who we hired to help with the house, and most importantly I have wonderful friends and family who will bring me dinner and pick up my prescriptions when I can't get out of the house and make me feel normal when I want to cry and make me laugh when I feel like I'm about to pull my hair out.

Now since I haven't posted in forever I will just dump all the recent photos of my baby on you. I literally kiss him and tell him I love him a million times a day.  

My sweet Phoenix is 6 months old he is almost 18 lbs. He can sit up, has two teeth and he talks all day long, I mean alllll day long. He LOVES to eat. He'll chow down on sweet potatoes, avocado, pears, pretty much everything he tried!

Disneyland!

We got to meet up with Cody and his new bride at Disneyland for the afternoon and it was a blast. They are so much fun and we were so glad we got to hang out with them before they head to Texas for the summer.

From the moment we met up with them Cody did not put Phoenix down. He is one loved little boy.

Phoenix had a ball and was just soaking it all in. We went on the Jungle Cruise, Pirates, Haunted Mansion and Small World. It's amazing how many rides little ones can go on in the park!

Nothing better than snuggles from a sleeping babe. He did not want to let us take him back!

My little brother gets hitched!

My little brother is the best. He is such a catch and of course it didn't take him long to get snatched up! He found the most darling girl on the planet and they really are a perfect match. We had such a great time celebrating with them. But lets start from the beginning...
We decided to drive to UT thinking "Hey, babies like to sleep in the car. The motion and the sound are soothing." What were we thinking? Our baby screamed pretty much the entire way. Nightmare! So we split it up and stayed in Vegas with one of my girlfriends which was such a nice break. That poor boy.

Once we were in Utah, we had a wonderful time.

My sister was able to come out from CT with her little family, so the Macks were all together for the first time in a long while. This year is the year of babies for us Mack girls and since Kendra was due June 1st, we decided to throw her a shower while we were there. It was so fun to get together and to meet some of her friends.

We also had the chance to have lunch with Madison, our sister in law to be. Since Jes and I hadn't met her before that weekend it was really fun to get to know her better.

The wedding was beautiful and they could not have looked happier. Such a great day.

That night was their reception and it was so much fun.

The reception hall was gorgeous and the food was so delicious. I ate my weight in crepes and loved catching up with friends and family. Such a great night.

The highlight of the weekend, aside from the wedding of course, was getting to meet Jes' little boy Otto and for my family to meet Phoenix. There was a lot of babies being juggled and passed around.

Love my family!

Mother's Day

My very first Mother's Day as a mother and the hubby spoiled me rotten. Aside from roses and a gorgeous new watch, he took the babe and I got to sleep the whole night! He really is the best.

I am so grateful for this sweet boy who made me a mother. I have always been a mother, but little Phoenix made it official.

He really is the center of my world and I could not be more in love with this little boy.

Baby Blessing

So this is super late...but we blessed our baby on Cinco de Mayo! Some of Mason's family was able to come out from Arizona and it was great to spend the weekend with them.

 We spent Saturday afternoon at the Long Beach Aquarium.

Phoenix slept through most of it, but he woke up just in time to get plenty of snuggles from his Uncle Whit! 

Sunday was the baby blessing and we felt so blessed to be surrounded by friends and family. (Wishing I got pictures of everyone, but here are just a few!)

This kid was so awesome the whole day. Seriously the sweetest little baby on the planet.